Unless you’ve been on vacation to the moon over the last few weeks, you’ll have undoubtedly heard all about the Unicorn Frappuccino that has taken the internet and Starbucks customers by storm. It’s an insane fusion of sugar, food colouring, sugar, sprinkles and more sugar that will melt your tastebuds with sweetness.
The startlingly colourful drink is on sale for a short time period only, which, of course, has only added to the consumer-driven frenzy to try the beverage. If a quick scroll through Instagram is anything to go by, this blinding beverage is every amateur photographer’s dream come true. Multi-coloured coffee from Starbucks that happens to be ludicrously photogenic? How could any Instagram user worth their salt miss out on the opportunity to capture the #coffegoals drink in all its effervescent glory?
Unfortunately though, not everyone is so enamoured by the kaleidoscopic coffee; as Starbucks baristas everywhere have been taking to the internet in droves to lament the hellish experience of concocting the beverage on a seemingly never ending loop. For staff it’s been akin to a psychedelic nightmare pink nightmare, an unending hell that only ends once whatever gives the drink its glittery appearance runs out.
One barista shared a harrowing photo of his hand – stained pink from relentless Unicorn Frappuccino creation
Hell hath no fury like a Starbucks barista scorned
“a poison-infused abomination”
“SEE THE RAINBOW, KILL THE RAINBOW”
“Hi, could you tell me about the new Unicorn Frappuccino?”
Worth it for the Insta likes?
Are the rumours true?
Don’t make me go back there
In case you are still keen to try the concoction for yourself (sorry Starbucks employees), then here is how the coffee chain describes the Unicorn Frappucino on its webpage;
“Here for a few days only. The flavour-changing, color-changing, totally not-made-up Unicorn Frappuccino. Magical flavours start off sweet and fruity transforming to pleasantly sour. Swirl it to reveal a color-changing spectacle of purple and pink. It’s finished wish whipped cream- sprinkled pink and blue fairy powders.”
Quite what “fairy powder” consists of, I’m not sure. Essence of pixies? Blended Barbie doll? Actual, real-life unicorns? Whatever it is, I’m sure it’ll rot your teeth and make you pretty dang fat in the meantime. You can trust me on this: my parents are dentists and there’s no way they’d look me in the eye after chugging one of these bad boys.
Happily for baristas, the drink is only “here for a few days” according to the Starbucks website, so they shouldn’t have to toil in silent fury for too much longer, but my heart does go out to them and the relentless hours spent making endless Unicorn Frappuccinos to sate the thirst of the legions of Instagram-ers battering down the door of their local coffee house.
If nothing else this drink is pretty creative, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t actually curious to try it for myself. If you love all things Starbucks, then take a look at our article showing that you’ve been using Starbucks cups wrong your whole life. Happy sipping!