Every single one of us has a celebrity crush, and those of us who claim they don’t are most likely too ashamed of their “bizzare” taste. In fact, we probably have a whole list of famous people we find charming, captivating and sexually attractive. Maybe some of us even fantasize about our celebrity crushes, and wonder what they look like underneath their expensive designer clothes.
Well, luckily for all of you gossip hounds out there, there are a number of Reddit users who are very willing to share stories about a rather heated rendezvous they or someone they know once had with a celebrity! Bear in mind, the men and women these celebrities hooked up with are very ordinary people, making their tales all the more sordid…
1. Reddit user TheIcehouse knows someone who dated Jackie Chan, and he has proof!
“My friend’s mom was a flight attendant for Southwest Airlines back when this was an awesome thing to be.
She has several stories of famous people hitting on her, and actually dated Jackie Chan for a bit. Here is a picture of them together. She said he was very sweet.”
2. According to Maxpower1234, Musician Darius Rucker manages to be good in bed and a gentleman at the same time. Allegedly of course…
“A girl I used to have an on again, off again fling with had sex with Darius Rucker (hootie from hootie and the blowfish). She said he was a fantastic lay, a perfect gentleman, and even sang to her in the morning as he made her breakfast. On the way out he thanked her for being a good host and said she had a lovely house.”
3. I mean this is insane: Smark_Henry knows a guy who slept with – wait for it – STIFLER’S MOM
“Not me, I’m lucky to ever even get with non-celebrities, but a pretty good friend of mine had sex with Jennifer Coolidge (Stifler’s mom) this year. He’s only 27 and she’s 52 so the ‘prowling cougar’ character she’s famous for may be kinda accurate. He gets embarrassed if you bring it up, but I’m like, dude, you banged the quintessential MILF, there’s an entire genre of porn named after the term that person popularized, own up to it with pride!”
4. BobDolesPotato knows a mom who was a little too keen to be down with kids when she slept with rapper DMX
“Friend of a roommate’s mother fucked DMX. we got his number from her cell phone but his answering machine message was just him barking for 30 seconds.”
5. A girl at DudeManBroSloth’s school hooked up with Based God… I’m sure he was a catch…
“This chick at my school hooked up with based god when he preformed at our 4/20 spring jam festival thing and when she woke up in his hotel room he was gone, there was like 23 dollars and a little bag of really shitty weed by the bed. hilarious.”
6. tdub1111’s own mom couldn’t help but blurting this out to him when he was 10
“My mom’s coworker banged Bon Jovi. She told everyone about it including me when I was 10.”
Imagine being a huge fan of a celebrity, meeting them and getting not a photo out of them, or even an autograph, but a hot and steamy night that you’ll remember for the rest of your goddamn life…
“I know a girl who had sex with Ron White (I know, right? shudder).
She said, “It was very pink” when referring to his dong, but said he smoked her out with some super dank weed and had a fat stash to boot.”
8. plissken627 had sex with Brian Bell from Weezer and he was chivalrous enough to serenade her afterwards
“I had sex with Brian Bell from Weezer when they were touring in Manitoba. Great guy. He played the say it aint so solo for me”
“A few years ago a woman I worked with always bragged about how she slept with Steven Tyler when she was 18 (she’s probably in her late 40s early 50s now). According to her, they still talk on the phone about once a year, not sure if that’s true though.”
“Blew the drummer of a reasonably big 90’s punk rock group in the back of their tour bus. I was young and dumb and had terrible aim, so he ended up cumming all over his shirt. On my way out, I was introduced to the rest of the band… I ended up shaking all their hands. It was awkward.
He and I keep in touch occasionally, but we’ll go years without talking. He set me up with backstage passes once when he was in town and he actually toured me around when I had a 10 hour lay over in his city.
7/10. Not bad.”
11. diba_ knows someone who not only slept with Derek Jeter, but had a legit relationship with him!
“My friend’s cousin dated Derek Jeter for a while and had keys to his apartment. According to the story she entered one day to find him butt ass naked on his couch watching highlights of himself and bumping his chest with his fist saying “YEAH JEETS, YEAH JEETS”.”
When this mom was in her youth, she gave a famous rockstar a blow job, little did she know that she’d be describing the taste of his penis to her 15-year-old son and all his friends decades later…
If you were lucky enough to share a night of passion with a famous person, what’s the very first thing you would do afterwards? Well, tell everyone about it of course! And then wait for someone to share it with a bunch of strangers on Reddit…
12. Tanto628’s mom once gave Chad Smith a blow job, and felt the need to divulge this information to her teenage son…
“My mom dated and performed oral sex upon Chad Smith of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I found out about this in high school when I had a bunch of friends over one night. We were trying to make my mom uncomfortable with our innuendo and humor and she drops that bomb shell on us. She described it in detail, to a room full of fifteen year olds decked out like Hot Topic billboards. You never forget a moment like that, hearing your mom describe the taste of a famous drummers load.”
13. According to Harley Quin Kid Rock slept with an ordinary woman, and that ordinary woman happened to be a stripper!
“At the club I work at several years ago (maybe five) kid rock came in one night after playing downtown. Well he hit it off with one dancer named Destiny. They went back to his tour bus, where they got fucked up and did they deed. She supposedly hung out with him for a week. And apparently he likes rough anal. So there’s that.”
14. According to vurtforge, John Mayer asked if he could fist a complete stranger
“In college my friends and I made side money working setup for conventions. This was in Dallas around 04 or 05 and we had finished the day at an anime convention called A-Kon and were relaxing in the hotel bar afterwards and in walks John Mayer, who apparently had a concert nearby the next night. After a few drinks the only female in our crew gets up the nerve to go talk to him.
From our perspective they converse and drink for an hour or so and then leave together; we all cheer and go back to our booze. Less than 30 minutes later she comes back to the table barely able to keep a huge grin off her face. We all slap her on the back and ask what happened. Her response: “Well we got up to his room and we make out for a bit and then he says ‘So are you going to let me fist you or what? Because if you aren’t there are plenty of girls here that will.'” This is the guy that wrote ‘Your Body is a Wonderland.'”
15. ThrowAwayAllDamnDay is just a little bitter about the size of Nickelback’s package…
“I know a girl who used to hook up with Chad Kroeger from Nickelback all the time. Said he is hung like a horse which kinda pisses me off.”
16. evilive was told that Slash is a gentle lover
“A friend of mine lost her virginity to Slash after a GnR show back in the early 90s. Apparently he was a real gentleman and a good fuck.”
So there we have it; a bunch of ordinary people who managed to find themselves in bed with a celebrity! Have you ever slept with a celebrity? Then why not share it on Reddit, or better yet get an acquaintance to do it for you. I mean, Reddit may be anonymous and all, but it’s probably not the best idea to talk about your own sex life on the internet!